Thursday, April 1, 2010

The India Twitter Story: The Story you never knew about!


The Indian twitter dream run has started this year and many celebrities are taking to it like fish to water. But do you know what started it all. Read on to know the true story......

On the eve of New Years eve 2010 a man called @KartikDayanand wrote a blog post called You can Be Superman : Use Twitter and sent it to @PritishNandy via @Minduread

@PritishNandy reads it and loves it. He calls it an 'Excellent Read' and instantly re tweets to his then 16,000+ followers

Among his followers are some highly influential people like @kjohar25 who has been trying to coax king khan SRK for a long time to join twitter

The moment @kjohar25 reads this Superman Post he forwards a copy to SRK on his email id. 

SRK reads it and thinks what the hell. I too want to be Superman and then instantly announces to the world the very next day “I AM SRK and I want to be Superman “. 

He creates a twitter ID called @iamsrk

Mainstream media goes gaga, and report that in the news. Thousands of SRK mad people start following @iamsrk on twitter

@ShashiTharoor who is the Indian with the highest number of followers on twitter feels insecure and wonders how to counter @iamsrk

@ShashiTharoor tries to best @iamsrk at this own game and creates a controversy to gain more followers by making the cattle class statement

He succeeds big time and gets a big leap of followers

Also meanwhile the headquarters of Twitter notice this strange surge in traffic to twitter because of the Superman Post.

They are excited at first but then realize that it might crash their servers. They decide to ban the word Superman from twitter.

Then realize it would be impossible to ban the word Superman so instead block the word Superman from being used as a password in future

@iamsrk who likes to be number one in all things in life wants to be number 1 here too.

@iamsrk realises it’s not as easy as it looks. So he starts tweeting about positivity and life similar to @MaheshNBhatt, keeping in tune with his upcoming movie My Name is Khan

Hrithik feels inspired and calls himself @iHrithik He wonders what to write about and starts giving tips about body building. He soon runs out of stream.

@Shahidkapoor who is a big fan of @iamsrk decides to ape him and he also starts speaking philosophy like him.

Since then @iamsrk has moved on to other things in life but poor @shahidkapoor is still stuck with the philosophy thing and is confused as to what he really wants in life

Genilia desouza who is the co star of @Shahidkapoor in chance pe dance also decides to join twitter

She calls herself @Geneliad and her biggest fan @chetan_bhagat goes gaga and can’t contain his excitement

But at the same time @chetan_bhagat is pissed off with the 3 Idiots team and is wondering how to give it back to them

By chance @chetan_bhagat who follows @PritishNandy reads the Superman post and thinks “Oh ya, now i know how to take on the 3 Idiots team, twitter is my weapon, i will be superman too”

He starts his give me my credit campaign on twitter and manages to create quite a ruckus but somehow never bothers to thank or follow @KartikDayanand the writer of the Superman post

@chetan_bhagat finds his moment of glory as no one from the 3 idiots team is on twitter

He continues to make fuss while suddenly there is another post from @KartikDayanand via @Minduread called 3 Idiots : Confusing a Nation!

Once again @PritishNandy reads it and loves it, he re tweets this post to his now growing followers which has few more influential people from media like @BDUTT @sardesairajdeep @virsanghvi and @sagarikaghose.

@sagarikaghose thinks she had written the most controversial review for 3 idiots but is stumped to know that someone else has outdone her

Same sentiment is shared by @taran_adarsh too, he does not know what hit him. 

Vidhu Vinod Chopra and Raju Hirani who had plans to join twitter decide to drop their plans seeing the 3 idiots post

@allusirish who is the co producer of Ghajini also reads this post and shares it with his followers

His uncles are the telugu Superstars Chiranjeevi and Pawan Kalyan

He also shares this over dinner with his brother Bunny aka Allu Arjun, his father Allu Arvind and his cousin Ramcharan Teja the rising superstar son of Chiranjeevi

There were talks of remaking 3 idiots in Telugu, they decide to drop the idea the moment they see the 3 idiots post

Menwhile @chetan_bhagat thinks his issue is like a non issue in front of the new 3 idiots post.

He makes a silent retreat and starts talking about lord Krishna and also takes a sabbatical from twitter. He feels lost.

@ActorMadhavan when asked to take a stand says no comments and shies away from tweeting for a while

Same is the case with @1mrankhan who is the nephew of Aamir Khan, he coaxes Aamir to make a statement on the 3 idiots post but to no avail. Not knowing what to do he too makes a great escape from twitter and goes underground.

@udaychopra and @sonamakapoor too do the same thinking that it’s in fashion to go underground

Farhan Akthar who till then wasn’t on twitter hears all this fuss and feels insecure to know that there is another Kartik who might steal the thunder from him

He creates his twitter id @FarOutAkhtar and starts promoting his movie

He quickly adds an extra H in kartik to make it sound heavier and calls his movie Karthik Calling Karthik so that there is no doubt left as to who the really popular one is.

He is still not sure if he would succeed and manages to rope in Deepika Padukone who starts tweeting the same day by the name @deepikapadukone

@PriyankaChopra too feels insecure because @DeepikaPadukone is getting active on twitter. She tries her best to be noticed

@Priyanka Chopra tries to make an impression that she is popular by visiting the twitter headquarters in USA and does a live broadcast to the audience at NDTV Indian of the year show

@priyankachopra also manages to become the brand ambassador for the NDTV greenathon event.

This upsets Aishwarya Rai and she coaxes Abhishek to do something similar.

Abhishek who is also on twitter by the name @juniorbachchan thinks its high time he too did something serious other than talking about football, thinks about it seriously

@juniorbachchan manages to become the brand ambassador of the Earth Hour

Aha, he has outdone @priyankachopra

@priyankachopra is pissed off and decides to unfollow @juniorbachchan

Meahwhile the old nemesis of Priyanka @realpreityzinta is busy making plans for IPL and Shilpa Shetty too joins the race calling herself @TheShilpaShetty

IPL begins and the whole country is talking about it, @LalitKModi and @iamsrk do their part

@Actor_Siddharth starts giving ball by ball commentary of the matches and people start unfollowing him

@mandybedi also joins the fray to add some glamour

No one is talking anything about Earth Hour

@juniorbachchan is worried; he wonders how to use twitter to promote the cause

He asks his best friend @Riteishd to help him out

But all he can talk about is @jacquie_furr

Even @vivek_oberoi is able to get more attention to #Prince than the earth hour

And @shrutihaasan gets more attention talking about Barbie Dolls and Crows

@juniorbachchan is pissed off and then happens to watch the Murugadoss- Chiranjeevi movie Stalin which is a rip off from pay it forward and gets a brainwave from there

@juniorbachchan bombards twitter with messages to his followers asking them to follow earth hour and to tell everyone they know about it, just like in the movie.

@KartikDayanand is spending a lazy afternoon in front of his laptop thinking what to write about next and is pissed off to see all those messages in his timeline

He wonders, India is anyway so backward and Earth Hour seems like a joke

@KartikDayanand sends few tweets ridiculing @juniorbachchan calling the earth hour a joke

@KartikDayanand is not alone, 99% of the world thinks so too

@juniorbachchan is pissed again

Meanwhile IPL is in full swing. There are more entertaining people contributing entertaining stuff online

@jhunjhunwala makes grand entries daily and finds new things to talk about sparking quite a funfest

He starts trending topics like #angadbediisgod and takes potshots at the MRF Blimp. People love it

Earth Hour seems to be a lost cause, @juniorbachchan is worried @priyankachopra is happy

@KartikDayanand seems to suddenly have a change of heart as he has a eureka moment at his sons school

@KartikDayanand writes about Earth Hour calling his post Earth Hour : Hour of Ignorance

He sends it across to @juniorbachchan and ABjr is ecstatic

He instantly retweets this link to his 1 lakh plus followers and the world stops ridiculing Earth Hour

Central govt feels insecure and thinks why didn’t they think of what @KartikDayanand wrote in his blog

They immediately axe @juniorbachchan for tweeting @KartikDayanad’s post of Earth Hour

@juniorbachchan is pissed again and this time his dad is also pissed

The big B wants to outdo @KartikDayanand now

He writes his blog and rants about the govt

@juniorbachchan is off to Goa and starts looking for some Punjabi Chinese food to soothe his nerves

Big B is wondering why his blog is not getting the traffic which it should be getting. Little does he know that he is not yet on Twitter and hence not Superman

@kjohar25 hasn’t yet convinced big B to join twitter, he is more busy these days wondering how it would be to hold @rgvzoomin’s hand while watching Phoonk 2

@KartikDayanand and @minduread have a good laugh and think the world should know a little bit more about twitter

So @KartikDayanand is busy writing this post while @fakingnews is wondering whether to report this piece as #faking or #notfaking news

Hope i could open your eyes to the truth behind the influx and activities of the who’s who of Indian Tweeters!